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a little while ago i wrote about creating peace and white space in my life... it seems like my whole life has been characterized by being super stressed out and i really needed to find some peace and stillness. it has definitely been a good thing. yet at times i wonder if i've perhaps created too much stillness in my life...i know that sounds crazy but too much of a good thing isn't really a good thing. i think that in my quest for stillness, a lot of joy and excitement got pressed out of my life. i have a tendency to stifle my emotions around others, even if the emotion is a good one. perhaps i have been around too many people who think that showing emotion is weakness. they are wrong. so wrong. i fear becoming emotionless - for to have emotion is the essence of being alive! i am always reminded of how joyful life can be when i am around my little sister. she makes me feel alive. we laugh so hard, we explore new places, we set paper lanterns free in the night sky...i want to feel. i want to be alive.